i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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