I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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