what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
