They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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