Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
false alarm, still single
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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