giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
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