We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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