Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
