I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
