Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street

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(630): View more from Illinois

The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..

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(925): View more from California

Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends

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(707): View more from California

then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"

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(703): View more from Virginia

She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis

(1-703): View more from Virginia

Every man deserves at least one moment like that

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(647): View more from Ontario

he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?

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(913): View more from Kansas

You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.

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(513): View more from Ohio

I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.

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(425): View more from Washington

While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real

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