Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
