im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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