Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
