I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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