I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Randomize
