hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
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