This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I just found puke in my bra..
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
If its not for food we ain't going out.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
