They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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