what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
