I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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