You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
His nipple licking is glorious
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