Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You ate ashes out of my bong
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
