Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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