Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I want to fling myself into the sun
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
