Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
