I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
my being single is dangerous.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
