i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
