Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
