just tell him i said nine months
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
