I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Randomize
