didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
