The maid of honor just puked.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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