He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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