he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
