he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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