It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
