The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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