Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I am available for nakedness
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
