I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
