im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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