we have pet lesbian snakes
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
