where am i from again
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize
