okay pat passed out under dana's car
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she looked like the before picture.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
