Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
