dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I didn't notice because vodka
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
