Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
