he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Randomize