You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
