My boss' voice literally gives me gas
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
