is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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