There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
