Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
