guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
